BBQ

jakelandry:

Sam didn’t really want to go to the
BBQ. For some reason he’d felt obligated though. It was just another stupid Fourth
of July party. And the only person he knew was the host. It was one of his ‘friends’
from work. Really he’d just chatted with him around the coffee pot a few times
just nodding and telling him how interesting his life was. Well apparently he
took that as a true bond and felt like Sam really wanted to come to his party.

“There’ll be all kinds of fireworks
man!” his coworker said.

“Sounds awesome,” Sam replied
taking a long sip of his coffee.

His coworker had paused. “You
should come over man. It’ll be great! Like, you can meet some new people and
maybe a girl…?”

Sam had gotten used to these kinds
of comments from people. Even if he was in his late twenties he wasn’t that
into a dating scene. Apart from his low self-esteem and horrible body image he
didn’t know how to socialize with others. He’d usually just let them do the
talking and then they’d complain that he was too boring. It was something he
hated. But somehow he still ended up finding himself at the party.

‘I’m just going to stay 30 minutes
and make a quiet exit,’ he told himself. ‘Oops… Sorry I couldn’t find you to
say goodbye… It was a nice show though,’ he was already thinking of excuses explain his disappearance. It’s not like his coworker would have
noticed anyway. He had like 70 other guests to keep happy. It was insane.

But Sam was more impressed with how
big his home was. He couldn’t believe that his coworker was making so much more
than him. Sure Sam was a lot younger than him but this place was huge! Two
stories, finished basement, pool. The only thing Sam could think about was how
he deserved a raise.

“Enjoying the party?” a female
voice had found Sam’s hiding corner.

“Uhh…” he took a sip of his soda
trying to figure out what to say, “Yeah.” He smiled stupidly at his lie. It was
way too simple of an answer for the amount of time it took him to think of
something.

She just smiled at him anyways,
completely unfazed. “Clara,” she stuck out her hand to greet him.

“Sam,” he forced a smile.

“Yeah dad loves his parties. Always
has to invite everyone who spends more than a couple of sentences talking to
him. It’s like he can’t control himself sometimes. He’s so impulsive,” she
tried to suppress her giggle. Obviously she cared about her dad but Sam couldn’t
help but agree. He was always like that in the office. Outgoing and friendly to
everyone there. It seemed like his daughter was exactly the same.

“But he’s nice,” Sam smiled back. “Never
starts any drama and gets his work done on time. He’s a good guy to work with.”

“I know. I shouldn’t be talking bad
about him,” she paused for a second. It was the first time it seemed like she
was trying to think of something to say. She spoke with such confidence that it
actually caught Sam off guard. This didn’t seem like someone who was very bashful. Even though they’d just met it felt
like they were friends who hadn’t seen each other for years. She took a drink
to offset the length of the pause. However it seemed like she was looking at
him with more intent. “I really like you swim trunks. Real festive.”

“Huh?” he looked down at his red, white and blue trunks. He must have forgotten he’d brought them. Sure he knew
there was a pool here but he didn’t know why he thought he’d go swimming. “Oh
yeah,” he laughed. “I guess I thought I might go swimming.”

“Then maybe you should try taking
your shirt off,” Clara poked at him.

Sam suddenly felt really self-conscious.
He didn’t like taking his shirt off in front of others. There were too
many places his extra weight hung off him weirdly. “Uhhh… I-I- I don’t know. I
don’t really like not…”

“Oh c’mon you’ll look fine. No one
will care,” her smile seemed a little devious. It was like she really wanted to
see him shirtless. “What’s point of working out if you don’t show it off.” She
gave him a bit of a wink.

He blushed furiously, “I don’t
really…”

“Are you one of those guys who
complains about rest days? C’mon dude. That’s when you’re body grows. I know
you like working out but come on… Learn to relax a bit,” she took another
drink. “Five intense workouts a week is enough.”

“I mean… Won’t the other guys be a
bit intimidated?” He rubbed the back of his head. It flexed his huge bicep almost as a reflex. He didn’t realize just how much his veins were bulging out. Sure he’d just come from a workout but he had a bigger pump than he thought.

She laughed. “Like you’ve ever
cared what other guys think. I bet you’re more of a leader. They’ll
probably end up following you like a puppy if you wanted them to. Just go throw them a Frisbee or something. Guys like that, right?” Sam thought back to how much he did throw the Frisbee around quad at his college. Guys really did like that short of thing. Clara must have wondered if he was still listening to her. She reached
for his thick muscular chest. “C’mon it’ll be weirder if you keep your shirt
on.”

“Well if you’re really ok with it,”
he gave her a sly smile. He was only keeping it on to be polite. He was at a ‘company friend’s party’ after all. He didn’t want to make things
awkward. But if his daughter was telling Sam to take off his shirt it had to be
okay. Sam was about to rip it off right there but realized he didn’t have anything else to wear
home.

“There ya go. Bet that feels great.
You were probably going to rip through that by the end of the night anyway.” She totally called him on it.

“Wouldn’t be the first time,” he threw
up a flex and admired it. She tried to hide her laugh behind her drink again. “Wouldn’t
be the first time I had a girl ask me to take it off either.” She practically
spit out her drink laughing. It made him feel really good. He did work
out a lot didn’t he? Clara was right. He deserved to enjoy his muscular body
from time to time. It had more uses than just working out.

“You dating anyone?” She asked.

“Uhhhh… No. Kind of in between
relationships right now.” He lied. His look was obviously concern. But Clara didn’t
care.

“I’ve got just the person for you
to meet. CATHERINE!” she shouted across the party. A couple of the girls looked
up. Their mouths slowly fell agape staring at the man next to Clara. ‘Wouldn’t
be the first time that happened either…’ he thought. “She’s just the girl for you. I
know you don’t need me to help break the ice but I’m worried about Margery over
there. She’s a bit… ‘handsy…’ And I don’t want Catherine to get intimidated.”

“Are you sure it’ll be okay?” Sam
didn’t know where this nervous feeling was coming from. He’d always been really
good when talking to girls. It shouldn’t have been weird. He took off his
sunglasses and looked away. Clara brought him back in.

“Course it is! You’ll do great. I’ll
keep Margery from getting in between you two. And then you talk to Catherine
about… Whatever,” Clara leaned in close to his ear and whispered, “She’s really
got a thing for cute guys with beards.”

‘Don’t they all…’ Sam thought as they walked over to Clara’s friends.

derekwilliams:

“Can u believe all these losers??” I said. My friend Jonas and I were hanging out at the mall, trying not to puke at the hoard of consumer zombies lurching from store to store.

It was the forth of july, so it was even worse than normal. Up and down the mall there were groups of people loudly joking and laughing, getting their murca on, and wearing whatever red white and blue they had in their closet.

I was dressed all in black like normal. So was Jonas. Fucking automatons.

“Shit Brad, isn’t that Taylor Rives?” Jonas said, pointing out a muscular college kid who was rapidly approaching. His broad shoulders were pushing out a blue tank top and he was wearing red shorts. Tan arms showed off the amount of time he spent out playing ultimate frisbee, and his rounded pecs pushing out showed the rest of his time was in the gym.

In our intro psych class last week, I’d made a pretty assholic comment about how different kinda of people were good at different shit…like maybe meatheads like Taylor shouldn’t be in school. The guy looked better suited for construction or being a gogo boy or something…

“Quick,” I pushed Jonas into the nearest store. It was a pop-up store, just there for July 4th. The sign above the door said “americana”

“I don’t wanna talk to that guy,” I said. “He’s such a fag”

It was tacky to the extreme. The whole place was filled with everything from muscle car kits to uncle sam posters to size large american flag tank tops. Another muscle bound moron was working the counter.

I felt a stirring in my dick. Weird.

Jonas was poking around in the racks, killing time while we waited for Taylor to pass by. As his hand touched a piece of fabric, he said “Bro, I think I’m gonna try this on”

He held up a t-shirt that had a picture of uncle sam on it. The text read “We want you” and then under sam it said “to lift, bro!”

Did Jonas just call me bro?

“Hey Jonas, let me see that” I said. But he was already gone, headed for a change room in the back.

“I think this one is more your style,” I heard a deep voice say. It was the moron from behind the counter. And he *had* to be a moron, he was holding out a tank top with an american flag print on it.

I grabbed it away from him, ready to shove it down his throat, or at least ready to laugh at him and make a shitty comment. But the moment I touched the fabric.

What?

I don’t remember what…huh…

I was rock hard. My cock was totally visible, outlined in my skinny jeans.

“You wanna try that on?” asked the clerk

“Uh yeah…”

“Changing room is in the back.”

I felt high or something. I couldn’t concentrate. So I just followed the instruction and stumbled towards the curtained stall in the back

Inside, I shucked off my cloths. Not just my shirt either. For some reason I felt like I had to get my skinny boddy totally naked. And then there I was, just staring at my naked body and my 5" hard cock in the mirror…

I held the american tank in one hand and looked down dumbly at it. It was a large…I…I really wasn’t

My other hand started pumping my cock automatically. And thats where the weirdness started

Yeah…like it hadn’t already started

My cock started growing. Past what it had ever grown before. Six inches? Or was that like eight? Maybe nine? Fuck, I didn’t know how to measure this shit.

It felt thicker too. I definitely couldn’t fit my hand all the way around it. Wait…no…yeah I could…my hands are fuckin huge

I looked in the mirror again. My body was swelling with muscle while I pumped my cock. Everything from my peaked biceps to my thick traps to my tree trunk legs and my perky bubble butt was bigger…wait…bigger? Nah, this had taken like years to work for. U don’t get this yoked overnite.

I pulled off my cap and tousseled my blond hair.

Lol, I was such a nascisist…I’d come here to try on a tank and I just had to strip down so I could see the whole deal haha…

Time to meet back up with my buddy tho…I slipped my red baller shorts back on – the fabric feels so good when u go commando – and then tried on this stars an bars tank that my bro at the counter recommended. Looked fuckin great on me…

I slipped my flip flops back on and then my snapback and left the change room.

“Jonny!” I shouted across the store. “Check it out! Total buy, rite??”

“Yeah brah!” Jonny said in that bodybuilder voice. Dudes like 240 and makes me look tiny at 190. Jonny’s Uncle Sam T was stretched tite across his pecs. U could see his hard nipples pushing against the fabric. He’s smarter too, goin to college on a football scolarship while I work at my Dads roofing company. I’m the lucky one tho – I’ve got a killer tan and don’t have to worry about shit! And I always got plenty of cash – I pick up shifts shaking my ass for the other fags in town, and most weekends they pick me up too!

We paid for our stuff and left to keep lookin around the mall. There’s nothin like checkin out some sales b4 u head out to drink beers and watch the firewoeks

I bumped into my buddy Taylor outside the store. “Hey bro,” he said. “U know this store? I picked up an awesome muscle shirt here last year!”

“Yeah, ” I said. “Just got this! Wanna get outside for a while? I gotta football in my bag”

We all ended up playing football for a while, but eventually Taylor and I ditched out to go back to his place and fuck. We definitely went out with the bros for beer and fireworks tho

U can’t miss the fireworks

Fuck I luv this country