Jake used to be a total geek. Until he met up with his roommates. He lived in an off campus house that was being rented out by the school. His three roommates were total jocks and partiers, honestly they should have been in a frat.

After 5 weeks of dealing with them being loud during his studying, he decided to confront them. But it backfired because once they started bumping shoulders with him and calling him dude and bro, it was like he lost control of his body. He started to chat and drink and flex with them. He started acting just like them.

Over the next few days his muscles bulged and got covered in a nice layer of fat. Sure his GPA dropped and sure he lost his scholarship because of that. But he soon joined the football team and was great at it. The school was probably about to give him a sports scholarship and then his grades really won’t matter. Now his relaxing on the patio of the house just chilling in shorts and no shirt because he knows he’s hot.

dumbfratboi:

Travis as started to regret his promise as he looked at himself. He was breathing heavily and drenched in sweat but he had promised Conner that he would have one workout with him and then maybe the gym rat would get off his back.
“Look at you brah.” Conner was saying he always talked like that now. “You always sitting in your room on Friday nights eating up grease playing the wrong video games. I know it’s tough now but soon you’ll see results of you keep at it.” Conner grinned. “You’ll get in shape and then everything else will fall into place.”
Travis looked back to his reflection. He knew he had been drowning but suddenly it looked so terrible on his face. With some effort he made himself smile. “There you go dude!” Conner yelled. “You love this work out!”

“I love this workout!”

“You hate your classes bro.”

“I hate my classes.”

“You want to rush NU.”

“I want to rush NU.”

“You want to blow me in the showers.”

“I want to blow you in the showers.”

“You love the gym!”

“I love the gym brah! Let’s do another rep!”

playernumber37:

go on bro
you know you want to.
you can smell the new leather, the slightly mothballed paper
crinkling in the orange box
your hands picking them up
for the first time.
stiff but pliable.

“needing” them isnt necessary. you want them. you should have them. i see you hesitating. a little expensive. but you could afford it. and they call to you. the sweet siren song soothes and seduces your senses. stop stalling and submit. it’ll be so sudden when it happens bro, a new email, a notification, and you will swell with pride knowing they have been shipped to you

slip the sneakers on over your socks. they subtly sigh as you do. they were made for you, as you were for them. let the laces hang loose for a second bro. take your first step. a little tingle in the soles. your brain feels funny, a little pressure in the sides of your skull. like a little hangover.

look at yourself
in the mirror. your reflection:
dunks
Nike Elite crew socks
Nike baller shorts (blue)
brotank
Nike wristband (yellow)
biceps
flex
grin

the sibilant snicker of your camera’s phone app. selfie. a second selfie. flex.

in your head, low at first then a sudden snapping imperious yelp

YO GET HYPE BRO

sssnap, another selfie.

that one you’ll upload.

seconds later, you stride outside
fitted cap screwed on your skull
(backwards)
the glare of the sun causes you to blink
blink again
blink again,
is this you? this is. where are you going?

the gym bro.

YO GET HYPE BRO

nothing else matters.

playernumber37:

wake up. face pressed into the pillow. cotton mouth from too many beers. fumble for glass of water. hard as a stone. your hand travels beneath basketball shorts to grasp said stone, as if testing it. roll over. lighter, bowl. flick, flame, lava-like half-burned pot, smoke sizzling into your lungs. repeat. dimly
aware of pot-themed decor on your walls. posters. you know you have socks with pot leaves. you call it ‘dope’ and sometimes ‘trees.’ you slide onto eBay and check your favorite sneaker sellers. you got a hankering to cop a sick pair of Js, ever since you saw that picture yesterday

this is not who you are, well, were. you changed overnight though they say that isn’t possible you have dawg. you drank wine and had smart talks with coworkers and friends. sure lately you’d been drifting a little (and they noticed) but people knew you differently, thought of you as smart. in this life you dont give a fuck dawg. sneakers matter. not much else.

shrug on a sneakerhead tee and clamp on your fitted dawg. this is who you are now.

wake up.

Dan was valedictorian of his high school graduation, he was accepted into MIT and had a bright future ahead of him. That was until he met Sam at an amusement park during the summer before college. Despite being a total stoner the dude seemed nice so they chatted, and exchanged numbers.

Sam kept trying to convince Dan to try some weed. He kept refusing but after a few months Sam was fed up with the subtle approach and blew some second hand smoke right in Dan’s face when they were hanging out. Dan got dizzy and liked it, finally agreeing to try some. Now look at Dan, he’s happy and relaxed as fuck. He decided last minute not to go to MIT, it’d be a waste of his time now, he’d rather smoke dope all day with his buddy Sam.